Serving Up The National Prayer Breakfast With Russian Flair

trump breakfast

This just in! Among the more obscure items found in the affidavit against Russian spy Maria Butina include the menu from the 2018 National Prayer Breakfast. Given the presence of 60 Russian guests, organizers planned a breakfast that highlighted the growing US-Russian relations while also appealing to Trump’s unsophisticated palate. Get a taste of this!

Menu for the 2018 National Prayer Breakfast

February 8, 2018


Well done eggs

Burnt bacon

Kolbasa (sausage)


McDonald’s® Egg McMuffin


Ore Ida® hash browns smothered with Velveeta® cheese and Blue Bonnet® margarine   


Syrniki (cheese fritters)

Tvorog (quark cheese) with honey


Putin Pancakes (blinis topped with smoked salmon, sour cream and chopped onions)


Bisquick® pancakes served with Smuckers® strawberry jam, Aunt Jemima® Butter Rich syrup and one scoop of Walmart’s® Great Value Homestyle Vanilla ice cream. (There is a note appended to be sure to deliver two scoops on the Presidential plate.)


Kellogg’s® Corn Flakes


McDonald’s® fried apple pie


Jeff Sessions’ Elfin Delight (candy, candy corn, candy canes, and syrup)


Instant Russian Tea with Tang®

McDonald’s® coffee served with Mike Pence’s “mother’s” milk



Bottle of Trump Vodka (out of circulation since 2011)

$6.66 gift certificate for use at (All Sales Final)

Matryoshka (Russian nesting dolls) featuring from smallest to largest dolls: Jeff Sessions, Betsy DeVos, Ben Carson, Mike Pence, Donald Trump/Vladimir Putin


Now that’s an awful lot of flavor to Put-in your mouth! So say ‘dasvidaniya’ to those early morning hungry bugs, and ‘zdravstvuj’ to somebody going to jail for collusion (please?)

Becky Garrison – 8.28.2018

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