Category Archives: Ryan Doris

7 Tips for Buying a TV on Black Friday

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Welp you’ve crushed piles of beige food and pulled yourself out of that deep turkey coma in the wee small hours of the morning to go wait in line in the frigid late November weather. All in the hope of stomping some necks and snagging the best deal of the year on the nicest tv around. But not every Black Friday deal is worth it and not every tv is created equal. So, know before you go, here are SEVEN things to look for when shopping for a TV this Black Friday.

1. Resolution

Ultra HD, 4K, BLUR-Vision, who can keep up? But it’s important to know, it’s not how good your tv looks when you buy it but more importantly if your tv makes a promise to improve itself in the coming year. Lose some weight, read more, or anything to let you know its not just going to lay around and watch itself all day.

2. Price

You’re going to see a lot of deals out there that seem too good to be true, and many will be. $200 for a 72 inch 4K smart TV?! Go fuck a dog, you liar! But what that price tag isn’t showing you is all the other hidden costs lumped in with your brand new set. Make sure you budget for all your soon to be needed diet pills and therapy sessions for your child’s abandonment issues.

3. Size

When it comes to watching the big game or that new blockbuster movie, size really does matter. Before you buy, make sure to check the size of the TVs dick.

4. Is it Right for You?

With so many TV’s out there how do you know which one is right for you? Well, it’s important to know if you can see yourself in the TV. I mean, truly see yourself. In those brief moments of nothingness, as the channels change, who is reflected back in the black mirror looming before you? Is it you? “It doesn’t look like me. That person is so old… How long have I been sitting here?”

5. Smart Tech

Every TV on sale this Black Friday will likely have built in smart tech. TV’s these days listen to you, anticipate your needs, and some are even watching you while you watch them! So, don’t be a show they’d skip. Turn your life into an interesting and wacky series of events to make sure your TV continues to tune in. Get your kooky neighbor to help you date two people at once, or trick your roommate into jumping a shark over your sofa. Either way your TV will be recommending you to all their smart device friends.

6. Flat or Curved?

A lot of TVs have the curve now, and others are the traditional flat. While both of these options are neat, nothing compares to the TVs that are an absolute right angle.

7. Extended Warranty

A lot of people will tell you the extended warranty is a scam. But look at it this way; technology is an investment. Don’t you want the comfort of knowing that when you pass this TV down to your child in 50 years, once the top soil is scorched and bands of gypsy marauders roam the wasteland, your daughter will be able to bring this heirloom into any burnt out husk of a best buy and get it repaired by the geek CHUDS?

There you have it. Go into this Black Friday armed with the knowledge and confidence to buy your perfect TV. Oh, and PRO TIP, pay the extra money for the power cable. It’s not cheap but it’ll make your new television work so much better.

Ryan Doris & Jack Ritchey – 11.21.2018

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Remember to Vote on November 6th

Well, its that time again. After two years of a truly wild news cycle now is your chance to do something. Go vote, if for no other reason, to reduce all those crazy news alerts that won’t stop popping up on your phone.

Don’t be like this guy, get out and vote!

Research your ballot and find your polling place here.

Ryan Doris, Kevin White, Gregg Roberson & Jack Ritchey – 11.05.2018

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Filed under Gregg Roberson, Jack Ritchey, Kevin White, Ryan Doris, Video

The Horror Movie Everyone’s Watching This Fall

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Just in time for Halloween, comes the Judge we’ve all been dreading.

Ryan Doris – 10.11.2018

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No Particular Reason – Episode 5

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In this episode we examine the tactics behind Brett Kavanaugh’s Supreme Court confirmation and the hyper-realistic details in the new video game, Red Dead Redemption 2.

(Not affiliated with National Public Radio in any way. Expect, ya know, to make fun of it.)

 

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Filed under Jack Ritchey, Podcast, Ryan Doris

Kavanaugh’s 2018 Calendar

This week, in an effort to defend himself against several (accurate) accusations of past sexual misconduct, Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh offered up a copy of his 1982 high school calendar for the public to scrutinize.

And while Dr. Christine Ford bravely retold her traumatic encounter with the suspected predator in front of Congress and the world, Kavanaugh offered an alibi in the form of some old trash he expected us to rifle through.

Well, we at Waxing Humorous actually got our hands on Kavanaugh’s calendar for this month! And needless to say, it’s a bit more telling. See for yourself.

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Wow, dude’s had a busy September! I don’t know about you, but I sure wonder what he got his mom for her birthday!

Also fuck this guy!

Jack Ritchey & Ryan Doris – 09/27/2018

 

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No Particular Reason – Episode 4

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In this episode we discuss protesting in America and we get a sneak peak of a new blockbuster movie franchise of biblical proportions.

(Not affiliated with National Public Radio in any way. Expect, ya know, to make fun of it.)

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No Particular Reason – Episode 3

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In this episode we investigate the use of smart tech in classrooms and the science behind the infamous “Yanni or Laurel” internet debate.

(Not affiliated with National Public Radio in any way. Expect, ya know, to make fun of it.)

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Filed under Jack Ritchey, Ryan Doris