After a friend confided that his girlfriend always starts reciting poetry when she climaxes (specifically, Lewis Carroll’s Jabbarwocky) I began to wonder just how unusual this kind of behavior is. So I asked my Facebook pals, “Have you ever had a partner who said or did something similarly odd or unexpected at that particular moment?
- “I laugh when I come. But I would never recite poetry.”
- “I once blurted out the name of baseball player Bob Aspromonte.”
- “A frat brother of mine could easily be heard by everyone on the dorm floor yelling ‘United States Marine Corps!'”
- “Sometimes I shout “Whoa Dogs!” I have no idea why.”
- “I hooked up with a guy once who, when he climaxed, shouted, ‘THANK YOU EVERYBODY, DON’T FORGET TO TRY THE FOCACCIA BREAD!'”
- “I once dated a dude who liked to call out the model and color of the cars he was planning on owning in the future.”
- “I’ve been known to start reciting Shakespeare. But only when I’m really drunk.”
- “I swear when I come. Does that count?”
- “I tend to go with the last few words of Ulysses.”
- “My first college girlfriend always started hollering in Italian when she was in the throes. I thought it was sexy, even though I had no idea what she was saying.”
- “About 3 years ago, my best friend hooked up with a guy who yelled, ‘ITS-A ME, MARIO!’ when he finished.”
- “Poetry? No way. Just heavy breathing, a long sigh, then snoring.”
- “I once had a one night stand with a guy who yelled ‘OH GRANDMA’ right before climaxing. (Which is one of the reasons it remained a one night stand.)”
- “I usually say ‘I love you.’ How unoriginal is that? (But my wife doesn’t seem to mind.)”
Do you emit a simple “I love you?” Or do you start proclaiming the Gettysburg address? Please tell us all about it in the Comments section!
Roz Warren – 11.14.2018.
Roz Warren (RosalindWarren.com) writes for everyone from the Funny Times to the New York Times.